So... What Am I Looking At?

Last weekend My Betrothed and I once again managed to be in the same city at the same time. This is going to be an increasingly rare event over the next couple of months, so we did our best to savor it. By which I mean, of course, that we interviewed a photographer, tasted some cake, shopped for invitations, and helped my Impending Sister in Law buy some maternity clothes. I'm not going to turn this site into "Impending Uncle" but did you know that some maternity stores set up a sort of "daddy's grotto" with flat screen television and free coffee, water, and juice? I enjoyed it! It was much better than the changing rooms at most department stores. Is it too early for me to start thinking about continuing this blog as "Impending Dad" after the wedding? It doesn't have quite the same "ring" to it, but still.

Anyway, on to the wedding planning.

Did you know that every year, in January, PF Chang's hosts the Arizona Rock n' Roll Marathon? Did you know that it cuts the Phoenix metropolitan area in half and makes getting from certain points "A" to certain points "B" nearly impossible? Did you know that two college educated, reasonably intelligent, professional adults can spend nearly an hour attempting (and failing) to cross the marathon line by car, by rail, and on foot with no success before remembering the existence of the freeway system in the city they both grew up in? I did not know any of these things until last Saturday. Do you know what this has to do with wedding planning?

We had agreed to meet with one of the photographers we're considering at a certain Point B, but we woke up that morning at a certain Point A. Luckily, though neither of us is really what I'd call an "early riser," we're both what I would call "paranoid about time," so we were out the door early, and arrived at Point B just before the photographer herself showed up.

The interview process was pretty straightforward. Outside of a few practical matters, however, My Betrothed and I come at this process from very different places, I believe. She looks at a picture (or an invitation, or a decorated cake) and sees specific elements that she recognizes as pleasing to her (or displeasing, as the case may be). I look at something like that and I get a general impression that is either positive or negative. If you give me long enough to stare at a photo, without the photographer right there looking at me, I can probably pick out things I like or don't like.

Here's an example of the difference: My Bride to Be was looking at a photographer's website the other night and mentioned that "she tends to cut off people's feet." If anything, when looking at the same photos, I may have noticed that "something" seemed "off." I had certainly not noticed that the "something" was missing feet. When I looked, though, it was true. That particular photographer (not the one we interviewed) left lots of space above people's heads in many of her photos, and this often lead to chopping the wedding party off at the ankles, knees, or thighs.

I'm not totally without attention to detail. I surprised my Bride to Be recently by describing to her the plumbing under her kitchen sink even though I had only seen it in passing, and not recently. I have identified and worked around problems with the sound system that we're setting up for the reception. But this visual design stuff throws me for a loop. And though I'm sure My Betrothed would never specifically come out and tell me that my approach to these things is "wrong," it's clearly a handicap when planning a wedding. So I keep having to tell myself to focus on things I'm not used to in ways unfamiliar to me. I keep having to ask myself (or My Betrothed if I'm not embarrassed), "so... what am I looking at?" just to stay on top of things.

It works, to an extent. The first time we went shopping for invitations was a disaster. We were talking about which ones I liked, and when I was unable to recall a certain design element from an invite I had said was "my favorite," she got very frustrated, thinking I wasn't taking this seriously. This most recent trip was much more productive, though I'm not sure I can take all the credit for that. Or any of it. Thanks to My Betrothed's do-it-yourself skills, we had already narrowed down the style considerably, and so I had a much better idea of our goal, rather than the "what am I looking at?" reaction.

I can tell you this, though: cake tasting is right up my alley! Mmmmmm. Cake!

~G2B