Hope Everyone had a good April 1st. I hope to have an actual post up on Friday. Maybe.
G2B
A World Of Pure Imagination
9 years ago
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Goodbye
Hey, everyone.
I know it's been some time since I posted here, and I owe you all an explanation.
There's just no easy way to say this, and believe me, I've tried thinking of better ways. And I've put it off until I knew that I absolutely just could not avoid it.
The wedding is off.
She and I have been fighting recently. It started over little things, I guess. I mean, we dealt with things just fine back in November when she was diagnosed with a sexually transmitted disease. And she stood by me even in January when my other girlfriend served me with a paternity suit. But lately...
I'm sorry. There are some things that I can handle and some things I just can't. And her insistence that the invitations be that particular shade of orange is... well it's the latter. I'm not saying I'm completely innocent here. Clearly I reacted too strongly when she fought my suggestion to have a live lamb slaughtered at the ceremony and then served to the guests. I suppose it's understandable that she might object to that. And I should have been more flexible. It's only a family tradition that goes back at least four centuries on my mother's father's mother's uncle's father's father's sister's mother's side.
I should have told you all sooner. I know I've put on a smiley face at work, and around town. No one knew anything was wrong. But now, it's all out in the open. My only regret is that I can't get my half of the deposits back.
~G(not)2B
I know it's been some time since I posted here, and I owe you all an explanation.
There's just no easy way to say this, and believe me, I've tried thinking of better ways. And I've put it off until I knew that I absolutely just could not avoid it.
The wedding is off.
She and I have been fighting recently. It started over little things, I guess. I mean, we dealt with things just fine back in November when she was diagnosed with a sexually transmitted disease. And she stood by me even in January when my other girlfriend served me with a paternity suit. But lately...
I'm sorry. There are some things that I can handle and some things I just can't. And her insistence that the invitations be that particular shade of orange is... well it's the latter. I'm not saying I'm completely innocent here. Clearly I reacted too strongly when she fought my suggestion to have a live lamb slaughtered at the ceremony and then served to the guests. I suppose it's understandable that she might object to that. And I should have been more flexible. It's only a family tradition that goes back at least four centuries on my mother's father's mother's uncle's father's father's sister's mother's side.
I should have told you all sooner. I know I've put on a smiley face at work, and around town. No one knew anything was wrong. But now, it's all out in the open. My only regret is that I can't get my half of the deposits back.
~G(not)2B
Thursday, March 11, 2010
What Brings Us Together Today
For those of you who may have missed it, I did eventually post earlier this week.
I'd like to start by commenting something up: In a previous post I mentioned My Betrothed and I seeing some off the wall wedding accouterments at a big box craft store. More recently, in her own post on the subject, the Bride 2 Be asserted that we weren't even there to look at wedding stuff. I can attest to that. We came in looking for something for a different project altogether, and some force pulled me inexplicably towards the wedding section in the center of the store. What was that force? Fate? Gravity? Destiny? My Betrothed grabbing my hand and dragging me along? I guess we'll never know!
Next, I'd like to give an update on wedding plans! We have (drumroll) booked a photographer (almost). Pending pesky little things like actually signing the contract, and actually sending in the deposit, we've got one all signed up. Best yet, this individual has expressed a willingness to be flexible if irrigation rears its ugly head (rawr).
The third item on the agenda today is Marriage. Not mine specifically, but the actual concept. It seems that two capitol cities have recently passed laws recognizing same-sex marriage. Washington, DC, and Mexico City, Mexico. Despite warnings from politicians in American and Canada (link probably NSFW, info on Canada at the end of the article), the very fabric of our society does not yet seem to be torn assunder. It may surprise some that I have not had the urge to abandon my betrothed and go find a nice young man (perhaps a doctor?) to settledown with instead. The fact that I could move to DC or Mexico City (Mexico City!!!) and marry such a male doctor does not seem to be affecting me. I suppose that must be because I am safely ensconced within a state where such activity is not permitted. Perhaps "not permitted" is too "soft core" a description. Let me be clear: Arizona already had a law against gay marriage, but in 2008 the voting public chose to amend the constitution to ban it even harder. However, there may be some sweet, sweet release soon for my home state. Nearby California also has a gay marriage ban that was backed by voters. It's currently being challenged in federal court. We'll see how that comes out. I can think of at least one California lawmaker who might want to see the ban removed. Apparently Roy Ashburn's attempts to stop gay rights have all been his way of playing coy. He was recently arrested for DUI after leaving a gay night club. Maybe he finally found a cause he could get behind? I think it will all be okay in the end.
Here's to envisioning a day when any two consenting adults can have their love legally recognized.
~G2B
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Chicken soup etc.
I apologize for missing posts recently. My Betrothed had to save my butt two Fridays ago, and I go and miss last Friday's post anyway! I can't claim I was sick. I can explain that My Betrothed, who lives 6 hours away, was sick. This isn't really a very good excuse, since I should have had Friday's post ready to go by Thursday night, and I didn't actually head South to look after her until Friday night. But I really, really did have something I was going to post Saturday, and that got put aside while I endeavored to cure the common cold.
I brought her soup. Canned "No-Chicken Noodle" soup, as well as free-range organic chicken broth with lots of veggies. And I brought her tea. But what she really wanted was homemade manicotti.
So I made her manicotti. With vegetarian imitation ground beef (she's not a vegetarian but she often eats like one), spinach, and lots of cheese. Here it is as I served it to her:
And here it is a few minutes later:
She's feeling much better.
I'll post what should have been last Friday's post this Friday. You can think of this post as this Friday's post, posted early on a Wednesday. Confused? Me, too.
~G2B
I brought her soup. Canned "No-Chicken Noodle" soup, as well as free-range organic chicken broth with lots of veggies. And I brought her tea. But what she really wanted was homemade manicotti.
So I made her manicotti. With vegetarian imitation ground beef (she's not a vegetarian but she often eats like one), spinach, and lots of cheese. Here it is as I served it to her:
And here it is a few minutes later:
She's feeling much better.
I'll post what should have been last Friday's post this Friday. You can think of this post as this Friday's post, posted early on a Wednesday. Confused? Me, too.
~G2B
Friday, February 26, 2010
Guest Post: Here Comes the Bride
Groom 2 Be's Note: Have you ever noticed that when opportunity knocks there is often a lot more to do than simply opening the door? I have been busy and rather stressed this week. My Betrothed has offered to blog in my place. I am in her debt. Without further ado: Here Comes the Bride!
Hello loyal Impending Groom readers! I hope you don’t mind the quick fill-in, but I’ll be feeding you the funny this week. At least this is a better notice than those little pieces of paper you get in the playbills at plays when they bring in a pinch hitter. You know… I think this is how John (Jen’s husband) got his start on Cakewrecks. Is there a future coffee-table-book deal and US promotional trip in my future?
Sorry. Weddings. That’s what y’all are here for. And that’s what’s been missing, right? What’s all this about nephews and beer cozies? We weren’t even at the store to look for wedding stuff, those crazy things just called out to us! “Come see the Crazy!” It’s amazing how stores are designed specifically to draw me over to the crazy. But I digress. There is one good reason, and a million not so good ones, that Wedding is not getting closer. And that, my dear friends, is irrigation.
Now, the last time I started to tell this story I asked my companions if they knew what irrigation is. They nodded assent. They, in fact, did not understand the true omnipotence of irrigation in the Valley of the Sun. Irrigation, gentle reader, is the life blood of said valley. If I may wax loquacious and pedantic (hey—I studied for the GRE and I am darn well going to get use out of all that time and effort!!) on this topic, I will tell you of the past. There were prehistoric peoples living in that Valley, and they had irrigation canals which sustained agriculture. When Easterners got out here for the dry air to cure their ailments, they thought: ‘hey—some of those nice plants could really settle this desert-wasteland. Let’s bring some of those out here! Now we just need water…’ And so they co-opted and aggrandized those canals and put in grass. Lots and lots of grass. The location of my impending nuptials relies on irrigation for its lush setting. Relies. On. It. So dependent, in fact, that when one savvy soul suggested not signing up for the allotment of irrigation on the date I desire, my come-back was quick and painful: the overflow pipe is on same said lush setting. Even if we don’t take the flood of water that irrigation entails, we are thwarted. And if someone else on the block doesn’t? Doomed.
One little date is all I ask for, and one little date is all that’s been denied. But wait… dates? How does irrigation befuddle the choice of a wedding date you ask? The lovely people at SRP (and they are wonderful, I am *not* being sarcastic), don’t and can’t publish dates until right before that torrent of life giving liquid surges towards your subdivision. So, hopefully, you now understand why you do not have a save the date. And why two other couples who got engaged after us, are getting married before.
A parting thought for you, as I leave: imagine some very, very happy children. They are playing in muddy, probably vector infested water. They are making chocolate milk with the mud and later turn to mud pies. Oh! And there’s a fish that’s come up through the canal system. Their parents let them keep it as a pet. They have no idea the future vexation irrigation will cause.
Hello loyal Impending Groom readers! I hope you don’t mind the quick fill-in, but I’ll be feeding you the funny this week. At least this is a better notice than those little pieces of paper you get in the playbills at plays when they bring in a pinch hitter. You know… I think this is how John (Jen’s husband) got his start on Cakewrecks. Is there a future coffee-table-book deal and US promotional trip in my future?
Sorry. Weddings. That’s what y’all are here for. And that’s what’s been missing, right? What’s all this about nephews and beer cozies? We weren’t even at the store to look for wedding stuff, those crazy things just called out to us! “Come see the Crazy!” It’s amazing how stores are designed specifically to draw me over to the crazy. But I digress. There is one good reason, and a million not so good ones, that Wedding is not getting closer. And that, my dear friends, is irrigation.
Now, the last time I started to tell this story I asked my companions if they knew what irrigation is. They nodded assent. They, in fact, did not understand the true omnipotence of irrigation in the Valley of the Sun. Irrigation, gentle reader, is the life blood of said valley. If I may wax loquacious and pedantic (hey—I studied for the GRE and I am darn well going to get use out of all that time and effort!!) on this topic, I will tell you of the past. There were prehistoric peoples living in that Valley, and they had irrigation canals which sustained agriculture. When Easterners got out here for the dry air to cure their ailments, they thought: ‘hey—some of those nice plants could really settle this desert-wasteland. Let’s bring some of those out here! Now we just need water…’ And so they co-opted and aggrandized those canals and put in grass. Lots and lots of grass. The location of my impending nuptials relies on irrigation for its lush setting. Relies. On. It. So dependent, in fact, that when one savvy soul suggested not signing up for the allotment of irrigation on the date I desire, my come-back was quick and painful: the overflow pipe is on same said lush setting. Even if we don’t take the flood of water that irrigation entails, we are thwarted. And if someone else on the block doesn’t? Doomed.
One little date is all I ask for, and one little date is all that’s been denied. But wait… dates? How does irrigation befuddle the choice of a wedding date you ask? The lovely people at SRP (and they are wonderful, I am *not* being sarcastic), don’t and can’t publish dates until right before that torrent of life giving liquid surges towards your subdivision. So, hopefully, you now understand why you do not have a save the date. And why two other couples who got engaged after us, are getting married before.
A parting thought for you, as I leave: imagine some very, very happy children. They are playing in muddy, probably vector infested water. They are making chocolate milk with the mud and later turn to mud pies. Oh! And there’s a fish that’s come up through the canal system. Their parents let them keep it as a pet. They have no idea the future vexation irrigation will cause.
Friday, February 19, 2010
Oversharing
If you celebrated Valentine's Day (or anti-Valentine's Day, or Arizona's Statehood Day) I hope you had an excellent February 14th. And if you live in the US, I hope you had a stupendous three-day President's Weekend. And if you don't do any of that, I hope you still had a great weekend last weekend.
I'm aware I've been a bit lax over the last couple of weeks. I want to tell you that this week is the week I get back up to standards here at Impending Groom. I want to tell you that, but...
I do actually have a few things to share with you all this week. I have a bad habit of oversharing with telemarketers, especially those canvasing for charity. This gets me into some funny situations and silly conversations. My guilt kicks in, and I never feel right simply telling someone "sorry, not today," especially if it's a cause that I support. A while back I got such a call, this one from Amnesty International. I felt compelled to tell him how, while I love the work Amnesty does, I was saving up for a wedding. I figured that everyone knows weddings tend to be expensive. I should have just kept my mouth shut. This guy understood about the costs... so he started giving me advice.
Apparently he'd gotten married a couple years ago himself. He proceeded to tell me all about the great deal he got on a catered venue in Las Vegas where, he assured me, he had a real wedding, complete with guests and reception and everything. He told me about his bride's family, and his family, and the music, and the food.
Everyone's a back-seat wedding planner! I thanked him for his advice. But I don't intend to suggest we move the wedding to Vegas.
One last story. I was going to hold this one back, just in case I was feeling uninspired next week. But recently one of my readers accused me of "going soft". So here's a brief installment in my ongoing critique of the WIC. My Betrothed and I spent part of this V-Day weekend shopping for wedding stuff at a big chain crafts store. There was all the usual stuff, most of which we neither wanted nor needed, and some of which we wanted but couldn't justify the expense of. And then there's stuff that just made us scratch our heads. Like this:
So...
Uh...
First off, these are wedding-themed beer cozies. Very, very classy, I'm sure.
But second, and perhaps more importantly, these were the only two they had. There was no "I'm the Groom, That's Why" or "I'm the Mother of the Bride, That's Why" or "I'm the Flower Girl, That's Why" cozies. Only the Bride gets a specific cozy. The Groom has to share one. Now, this is not to say that I don't think My Betrothed deserves her own cozy. If she desires a beverage in an aluminum can on the day of the ceremony, or at the reception, then I deem it proper that said beverage should be kept at a proper temperature by whatever means necessary, even if that means happens to be bright pink. My point is that I should get one, too. I realize that the stereotype is that the Bride is the one guzzling cheap beer out of a can in the middle of the ceremony, but... wait... that's not right.
Not pictured: White hat with rhinestones that reads "Bride." No black hat for the Groom.
~G2B
I'm aware I've been a bit lax over the last couple of weeks. I want to tell you that this week is the week I get back up to standards here at Impending Groom. I want to tell you that, but...
I do actually have a few things to share with you all this week. I have a bad habit of oversharing with telemarketers, especially those canvasing for charity. This gets me into some funny situations and silly conversations. My guilt kicks in, and I never feel right simply telling someone "sorry, not today," especially if it's a cause that I support. A while back I got such a call, this one from Amnesty International. I felt compelled to tell him how, while I love the work Amnesty does, I was saving up for a wedding. I figured that everyone knows weddings tend to be expensive. I should have just kept my mouth shut. This guy understood about the costs... so he started giving me advice.
Apparently he'd gotten married a couple years ago himself. He proceeded to tell me all about the great deal he got on a catered venue in Las Vegas where, he assured me, he had a real wedding, complete with guests and reception and everything. He told me about his bride's family, and his family, and the music, and the food.
Everyone's a back-seat wedding planner! I thanked him for his advice. But I don't intend to suggest we move the wedding to Vegas.
One last story. I was going to hold this one back, just in case I was feeling uninspired next week. But recently one of my readers accused me of "going soft". So here's a brief installment in my ongoing critique of the WIC. My Betrothed and I spent part of this V-Day weekend shopping for wedding stuff at a big chain crafts store. There was all the usual stuff, most of which we neither wanted nor needed, and some of which we wanted but couldn't justify the expense of. And then there's stuff that just made us scratch our heads. Like this:
So...
Uh...
First off, these are wedding-themed beer cozies. Very, very classy, I'm sure.
But second, and perhaps more importantly, these were the only two they had. There was no "I'm the Groom, That's Why" or "I'm the Mother of the Bride, That's Why" or "I'm the Flower Girl, That's Why" cozies. Only the Bride gets a specific cozy. The Groom has to share one. Now, this is not to say that I don't think My Betrothed deserves her own cozy. If she desires a beverage in an aluminum can on the day of the ceremony, or at the reception, then I deem it proper that said beverage should be kept at a proper temperature by whatever means necessary, even if that means happens to be bright pink. My point is that I should get one, too. I realize that the stereotype is that the Bride is the one guzzling cheap beer out of a can in the middle of the ceremony, but... wait... that's not right.
Not pictured: White hat with rhinestones that reads "Bride." No black hat for the Groom.
~G2B
Friday, February 12, 2010
The trick is to get back on...
Before I get into anything else, I want to congratulate a reader and frequent commenter on this blog, Wrayvin. Last weekend her boyfriend of over a year and a half proposed! They've only just started planning, but Wrayvin tells me they've picked a date, which is one thing My Betrothed and I have not done. Congratulations, you two! Keep us updated!
Second order of business: Many have pointed out that I did not post last week. There was no sinister reason for this, no illness in the family, no lottery ticket, nothing big happened last Thursday night to prevent me from posting Friday morning. It just didn't happen. It's a break in my resolution, but I figure that as long as I can get an extra post in some time in February I'll be good. Obviously the Link Mondays experiment broke me. Or I just didn't have any creative juices flowing last week. Either way.
Okay with all that out of the way, I better make up some time with a big, long, gushing post about...
Crud.
~G2B
PS: Happy Valentine's Day, to those who practice.
Second order of business: Many have pointed out that I did not post last week. There was no sinister reason for this, no illness in the family, no lottery ticket, nothing big happened last Thursday night to prevent me from posting Friday morning. It just didn't happen. It's a break in my resolution, but I figure that as long as I can get an extra post in some time in February I'll be good. Obviously the Link Mondays experiment broke me. Or I just didn't have any creative juices flowing last week. Either way.
Okay with all that out of the way, I better make up some time with a big, long, gushing post about...
Crud.
~G2B
PS: Happy Valentine's Day, to those who practice.
Friday, January 29, 2010
Happy Birthday
I promised a blog post, but I'm not in the mood to blog.
You see, blogging is an inherently self-centered activity, and right now is not the time for me to be self-centered. I'm not feeling particularly funny right now, either. So if you've come here looking for cummerbund jokes, I'm going to disappoint you. You see, at not quite 4:30pm yesterday a 7 pound, 5 ounce Baby Boy came into this world. My Impending Nephew was born healthy and (one imagines) happy. His parents (who have settled on a name other than Joaquin) are thrilled. My Betrothed was lucky enough to be in town when it happened, I wasn't. But I did get a bit of an adrenaline high from talking to her about it, texting her about it, and thinking about it.
So this post is dedicated to that baby boy. If, some day in the far flung future, you are sifting through old internet sites on your Apple iGlasses, you may come across this post. If the anonymity doesn't throw you off, I want you to know that this is your post. It went up the day after you were born, and it's meant to be about you. Even if your Uncle to Be had a hard time removing himself from the spotlight in this inherently self-centered activity.
Many things happened the week you were born. In fact, just the day before you were born, President Barack Obama gave his first State of the Union Address, and Apple Computer announced a product called the iPad. On the day you were born, the top music album (does music still come in albums when you're reading this?) in the US was a collection of songs recorded to benefit the survivors of an horribly destructive earth quake in Haiti.
2010, the year you were born, has been a bitter-sweet year up til now. Good things have happened, and bad things have happened. So far, though, the best thing that has happened to me this year was when your father sent me a picture of your mother holding you in her arms.
And that's it for this week's post. For those who missed it, I did an extra post on Monday, and I'll probably do another extra post this coming Monday. Cummerbund jokes will resume next Friday at the latest.
Happy Birthday, Nephew.
~G2B
You see, blogging is an inherently self-centered activity, and right now is not the time for me to be self-centered. I'm not feeling particularly funny right now, either. So if you've come here looking for cummerbund jokes, I'm going to disappoint you. You see, at not quite 4:30pm yesterday a 7 pound, 5 ounce Baby Boy came into this world. My Impending Nephew was born healthy and (one imagines) happy. His parents (who have settled on a name other than Joaquin) are thrilled. My Betrothed was lucky enough to be in town when it happened, I wasn't. But I did get a bit of an adrenaline high from talking to her about it, texting her about it, and thinking about it.
So this post is dedicated to that baby boy. If, some day in the far flung future, you are sifting through old internet sites on your Apple iGlasses, you may come across this post. If the anonymity doesn't throw you off, I want you to know that this is your post. It went up the day after you were born, and it's meant to be about you. Even if your Uncle to Be had a hard time removing himself from the spotlight in this inherently self-centered activity.
Many things happened the week you were born. In fact, just the day before you were born, President Barack Obama gave his first State of the Union Address, and Apple Computer announced a product called the iPad. On the day you were born, the top music album (does music still come in albums when you're reading this?) in the US was a collection of songs recorded to benefit the survivors of an horribly destructive earth quake in Haiti.
2010, the year you were born, has been a bitter-sweet year up til now. Good things have happened, and bad things have happened. So far, though, the best thing that has happened to me this year was when your father sent me a picture of your mother holding you in her arms.
And that's it for this week's post. For those who missed it, I did an extra post on Monday, and I'll probably do another extra post this coming Monday. Cummerbund jokes will resume next Friday at the latest.
Happy Birthday, Nephew.
~G2B
Monday, January 25, 2010
Link Mondays: A New Tradition (?) (Or: Why I should change my name to Jennifer if I want to be a wedding blogger)
Maybe I'm getting a bit over-ambitious. So far, this year, I've kept up with my resolution to post once a week. I don't know if bumping that up to twice a week is necessarily wise, given my past tendencies to burn out on projects like this relatively quickly. (See November and December, 2009)
But I also don't feel like a post made entirely of links to other sites should count as a "post" for purposes of the aforementioned resolution.
So I'm posting this on a Monday rather than the usual Friday, and hoping to start a new tradition of posting lots of links to things on Mondays. Today I'll be linking to several blogs that I have found amusing, useful, intriguing, or captivating during my tenure as Groom to Be.
First up is a site My Betrothed and I have been following since well before I started this blog, Cake Wrecks! Five days a week (sometimes more) Jen Yates and/or her husband John post one or more professionally decorated cakes that just really make you stop and go "WTF?!" in the truest since of the acronym. On Sundays they post a "Sunday Sweets" feature, which is all about cakes that have gone right. It's not strictly a wedding related site, but they do have many choice wedding cake wrecks and sweets. Also, groom's cakes, a tradition I don't entirely understand. They have a book for sale, as well as some other stuff. This Sunday Jen's post was all about Mario Wedding Cakes! Since both My Betrothed and I are big Nintendo fans, we really enjoyed this one.
Next comes a wedding specific site, Green Wedding Shoes. The author of this site, also named Jen, is a creative director, graphic designer, and stylist. She describes herself as a recent newlywed, and her blog is just pretty! (I'm losing guy cred here, aren't I?) Don't get me wrong, there is text on the site, and she's a lovely writer but when I'm browsing her blog I mostly just stare and stare at the pictures. If you're planning a wedding, and need to peruse for inspiration, you could do much worse than scrolling through a few of Jen's blog posts. She seems to prefer funky and/or natural wedding concepts, which I like. She's got several posts on green weddings, Do it Yourself ideas, and backyard weddings, all of which I'm still exploring. She also posts a lot about vendors that are local to her. And right now, until the 31st of the month, she's doing a giveaway for a free "Dream Love Shoot" for an engaged or married couple. She also has a ton of links that I'm still working my way through. For instance:
I just learned about the blog Earth Friendly Weddings while putting together this very post! Apparently it's the "official blog" of Earthly Affair, an eco-friendly wedding invitation site. The blog itself, though, is not limited to advertising the company's invites. Instead, there's information on buying organic food, some eco-conscious jewelry, and pictures of pretty wedding cakes. Which, I think, brings me full circle. Wait, not quite there yet. Turns out the blogger for Earth Friendly Weddings is named... Jen. Are these all the same person or something?
As I'm still new to the blogging thing, please feel free to let me know if this type of link-dumping is boring, useful, or both. See you Friday!
But I also don't feel like a post made entirely of links to other sites should count as a "post" for purposes of the aforementioned resolution.
So I'm posting this on a Monday rather than the usual Friday, and hoping to start a new tradition of posting lots of links to things on Mondays. Today I'll be linking to several blogs that I have found amusing, useful, intriguing, or captivating during my tenure as Groom to Be.
First up is a site My Betrothed and I have been following since well before I started this blog, Cake Wrecks! Five days a week (sometimes more) Jen Yates and/or her husband John post one or more professionally decorated cakes that just really make you stop and go "WTF?!" in the truest since of the acronym. On Sundays they post a "Sunday Sweets" feature, which is all about cakes that have gone right. It's not strictly a wedding related site, but they do have many choice wedding cake wrecks and sweets. Also, groom's cakes, a tradition I don't entirely understand. They have a book for sale, as well as some other stuff. This Sunday Jen's post was all about Mario Wedding Cakes! Since both My Betrothed and I are big Nintendo fans, we really enjoyed this one.
Next comes a wedding specific site, Green Wedding Shoes. The author of this site, also named Jen, is a creative director, graphic designer, and stylist. She describes herself as a recent newlywed, and her blog is just pretty! (I'm losing guy cred here, aren't I?) Don't get me wrong, there is text on the site, and she's a lovely writer but when I'm browsing her blog I mostly just stare and stare at the pictures. If you're planning a wedding, and need to peruse for inspiration, you could do much worse than scrolling through a few of Jen's blog posts. She seems to prefer funky and/or natural wedding concepts, which I like. She's got several posts on green weddings, Do it Yourself ideas, and backyard weddings, all of which I'm still exploring. She also posts a lot about vendors that are local to her. And right now, until the 31st of the month, she's doing a giveaway for a free "Dream Love Shoot" for an engaged or married couple. She also has a ton of links that I'm still working my way through. For instance:
I just learned about the blog Earth Friendly Weddings while putting together this very post! Apparently it's the "official blog" of Earthly Affair, an eco-friendly wedding invitation site. The blog itself, though, is not limited to advertising the company's invites. Instead, there's information on buying organic food, some eco-conscious jewelry, and pictures of pretty wedding cakes. Which, I think, brings me full circle. Wait, not quite there yet. Turns out the blogger for Earth Friendly Weddings is named... Jen. Are these all the same person or something?
As I'm still new to the blogging thing, please feel free to let me know if this type of link-dumping is boring, useful, or both. See you Friday!
Friday, January 22, 2010
So... What Am I Looking At?
Last weekend My Betrothed and I once again managed to be in the same city at the same time. This is going to be an increasingly rare event over the next couple of months, so we did our best to savor it. By which I mean, of course, that we interviewed a photographer, tasted some cake, shopped for invitations, and helped my Impending Sister in Law buy some maternity clothes. I'm not going to turn this site into "Impending Uncle" but did you know that some maternity stores set up a sort of "daddy's grotto" with flat screen television and free coffee, water, and juice? I enjoyed it! It was much better than the changing rooms at most department stores. Is it too early for me to start thinking about continuing this blog as "Impending Dad" after the wedding? It doesn't have quite the same "ring" to it, but still.
Anyway, on to the wedding planning.
Did you know that every year, in January, PF Chang's hosts the Arizona Rock n' Roll Marathon? Did you know that it cuts the Phoenix metropolitan area in half and makes getting from certain points "A" to certain points "B" nearly impossible? Did you know that two college educated, reasonably intelligent, professional adults can spend nearly an hour attempting (and failing) to cross the marathon line by car, by rail, and on foot with no success before remembering the existence of the freeway system in the city they both grew up in? I did not know any of these things until last Saturday. Do you know what this has to do with wedding planning?
We had agreed to meet with one of the photographers we're considering at a certain Point B, but we woke up that morning at a certain Point A. Luckily, though neither of us is really what I'd call an "early riser," we're both what I would call "paranoid about time," so we were out the door early, and arrived at Point B just before the photographer herself showed up.
The interview process was pretty straightforward. Outside of a few practical matters, however, My Betrothed and I come at this process from very different places, I believe. She looks at a picture (or an invitation, or a decorated cake) and sees specific elements that she recognizes as pleasing to her (or displeasing, as the case may be). I look at something like that and I get a general impression that is either positive or negative. If you give me long enough to stare at a photo, without the photographer right there looking at me, I can probably pick out things I like or don't like.
Here's an example of the difference: My Bride to Be was looking at a photographer's website the other night and mentioned that "she tends to cut off people's feet." If anything, when looking at the same photos, I may have noticed that "something" seemed "off." I had certainly not noticed that the "something" was missing feet. When I looked, though, it was true. That particular photographer (not the one we interviewed) left lots of space above people's heads in many of her photos, and this often lead to chopping the wedding party off at the ankles, knees, or thighs.
I'm not totally without attention to detail. I surprised my Bride to Be recently by describing to her the plumbing under her kitchen sink even though I had only seen it in passing, and not recently. I have identified and worked around problems with the sound system that we're setting up for the reception. But this visual design stuff throws me for a loop. And though I'm sure My Betrothed would never specifically come out and tell me that my approach to these things is "wrong," it's clearly a handicap when planning a wedding. So I keep having to tell myself to focus on things I'm not used to in ways unfamiliar to me. I keep having to ask myself (or My Betrothed if I'm not embarrassed), "so... what am I looking at?" just to stay on top of things.
It works, to an extent. The first time we went shopping for invitations was a disaster. We were talking about which ones I liked, and when I was unable to recall a certain design element from an invite I had said was "my favorite," she got very frustrated, thinking I wasn't taking this seriously. This most recent trip was much more productive, though I'm not sure I can take all the credit for that. Or any of it. Thanks to My Betrothed's do-it-yourself skills, we had already narrowed down the style considerably, and so I had a much better idea of our goal, rather than the "what am I looking at?" reaction.
I can tell you this, though: cake tasting is right up my alley! Mmmmmm. Cake!
~G2B
Anyway, on to the wedding planning.
Did you know that every year, in January, PF Chang's hosts the Arizona Rock n' Roll Marathon? Did you know that it cuts the Phoenix metropolitan area in half and makes getting from certain points "A" to certain points "B" nearly impossible? Did you know that two college educated, reasonably intelligent, professional adults can spend nearly an hour attempting (and failing) to cross the marathon line by car, by rail, and on foot with no success before remembering the existence of the freeway system in the city they both grew up in? I did not know any of these things until last Saturday. Do you know what this has to do with wedding planning?
We had agreed to meet with one of the photographers we're considering at a certain Point B, but we woke up that morning at a certain Point A. Luckily, though neither of us is really what I'd call an "early riser," we're both what I would call "paranoid about time," so we were out the door early, and arrived at Point B just before the photographer herself showed up.
The interview process was pretty straightforward. Outside of a few practical matters, however, My Betrothed and I come at this process from very different places, I believe. She looks at a picture (or an invitation, or a decorated cake) and sees specific elements that she recognizes as pleasing to her (or displeasing, as the case may be). I look at something like that and I get a general impression that is either positive or negative. If you give me long enough to stare at a photo, without the photographer right there looking at me, I can probably pick out things I like or don't like.
Here's an example of the difference: My Bride to Be was looking at a photographer's website the other night and mentioned that "she tends to cut off people's feet." If anything, when looking at the same photos, I may have noticed that "something" seemed "off." I had certainly not noticed that the "something" was missing feet. When I looked, though, it was true. That particular photographer (not the one we interviewed) left lots of space above people's heads in many of her photos, and this often lead to chopping the wedding party off at the ankles, knees, or thighs.
I'm not totally without attention to detail. I surprised my Bride to Be recently by describing to her the plumbing under her kitchen sink even though I had only seen it in passing, and not recently. I have identified and worked around problems with the sound system that we're setting up for the reception. But this visual design stuff throws me for a loop. And though I'm sure My Betrothed would never specifically come out and tell me that my approach to these things is "wrong," it's clearly a handicap when planning a wedding. So I keep having to tell myself to focus on things I'm not used to in ways unfamiliar to me. I keep having to ask myself (or My Betrothed if I'm not embarrassed), "so... what am I looking at?" just to stay on top of things.
It works, to an extent. The first time we went shopping for invitations was a disaster. We were talking about which ones I liked, and when I was unable to recall a certain design element from an invite I had said was "my favorite," she got very frustrated, thinking I wasn't taking this seriously. This most recent trip was much more productive, though I'm not sure I can take all the credit for that. Or any of it. Thanks to My Betrothed's do-it-yourself skills, we had already narrowed down the style considerably, and so I had a much better idea of our goal, rather than the "what am I looking at?" reaction.
I can tell you this, though: cake tasting is right up my alley! Mmmmmm. Cake!
~G2B
Friday, January 15, 2010
The Thing from the Expo!
The teeming masses filled my vision in every direction, a never ending feeding frenzy that simply could not be withstood. They moved as one, converging on first one location, then another, in a steady, single minded stream of mayhem. The exits were blocked. I could not escape. Nor could I avoid detection for long. There was no way out.
There was no way out.
There was no way out.
"Sweetie," My Betrothed said, shaking me, "get up! We've got to go to the bridal show today!"
"Oh!" I said, glad to wake up to her smiling face from the nightmare I had been having. On to the Bridal Expo!
Did I mention I don't like crowds? I think I did.
Let's back up a ways.
My Betrothed and I arrived from opposite ends of the state to attend the show I mentioned in last week's post. The first thing she did was open up the envelope that had our tickets in it. Along with the passes and various essential information were our name tags.
Hers:
And mine:
Ahem. "Guest." My Betrothed is the "Bride" but I'm just a "Guest." I see. Now, I understand, of course, that many brides choose to go to these things with their bridesmaids, mothers, friends, et cettra. But could there have been, perhaps, a box on the website that she could have checked to get a "Groom" nametag? No? Just asking.
We arrived at the convention center, and a slow steady trickle of people (admittedly, mostly women) were converging upon it. We walked in the front doors and were immediately met with a string quartet playing Pachelbel's Canon in D. There were big giveaways (with, of course, strings attached) in the lobby, but My Betrothed pulled me to the registration booth. We were given a big bag full of flyers and things. I pointed at my (still blank) "Guest" name-tag, and started to ask the person behind the desk about it. Without a word, she took the tag from me, and handed me this:
I was thrilled. I was ready. Into the fray!
The fray turned out to be rooms full of vendors, looking like some sort of Mirror, Mirror universe version of ComicCon. Except, of course, that in the Mirror, Mirror universe characters who were normally clean shaven wore goatees. In this universe, the thousands of unwashed, goatee'd geeks were replaced by beardless, mostly well groomed brides to be.
There were still lots of booths with expensive things that people want but don't need, and, oddly enough, some "booth-babes." I wouldn't have thought using frighteningly skinny women in bikinis would be an effective way to attract the attention of brides, but apparently the people at the sunless tanning booths seemed to disagree.
No, I did not snap a picture of that. My Betrothed was holding my hand and I was not about to start taking pictures of mostly naked women.
We stopped by several booths with photographers. Before the Expo we were pretty close to choosing one. Now we aren't. My Betrothed (who had attended this event with her sister the year before, for a wedding now nearing its first anniversary) bemoaned that there were not nearly as many caterers with food samples this year. We passed a booth advertising a string quartet (this one with a recording rather than live players). Oddly enough, this booth was also playing Canon in D. The crowd was beginning to get to me, when I saw a light at the end of the tunnel:
Booze. Yes, there were samples of booze. There were also open cash bars, but I didn't think that was a good idea. Not that having a full sized drink sounded bad, but buying one did not appeal to me. The picture above is of a kind of pre-mixed champagne cocktail. It was alcopop. It would have to do. Then we rounded the corner and found a booth for a local winery. Free tasting! Ka-ching!
Yes, there are vineyards in Arizona. Some of them are even decent. Get used to it! When California falls into the Pacific, the climate here will be even better, too.
We also saw some flower arrangers that caught our eyes. I understand flowers are important in this sort of thing. Oh, and we passed yet another booth playing Canon in D.
Towards the end, the crowds began getting to both of us. A few vendors who we had hoped to see were not there (if I had read the website more carefully, I would have known that). By the time we got to the end, where the Bridal Fashion Show was, the models were done walking the catwalk, and had decided that they were too sexy for their bouquets, which they threw everywhere. So we tried for the exit and it was closed.
There was no way out.
There was no way out.
We would have to turn around and battle our way through this:
We traveled upstream, like salmon going to spawn. Eventually we made it back to the entrance, which was the only sanctioned exit. We passed, again, the live string quartet at the doors. We stopped and listened. We asked them to play "All You Need is Love." (Love, Actually FTW!) As we turned to go, thoroughly enchanted, they began playing Canon in D again.
Then we spent the day helping my Impending Sister in Law, and my Impending Brother in Law put together my Impending Nephew's Ikea furniture (he's due very soon. His name is the subject of some contention, though. "Brady Zac" is not his official name. Sadly, Joaquin isn't either. This feud is mostly between people who aren't the parents.) If there's one thing Ikea knows, it's how to make baby furniture in a way that really hurts to put together. Ow.
Afterward, on our drive home, My Betrothed turned to me and spoke. She had been battered by a morning of over-stimulation and an afternoon of hand-numbing hex-wrench twisting.
"I'm glad we went to the Bridal Show," she said.
"Me, too," I agreed.
"Can you put that part in the blog?"
"Sure."
And unlike the exchange and dream sequence that opened this post, that last conversation actually happened. And we both actually meant it. In the end, after all the over-exposure to the Wedding Industrial Complex, and all the rest, we took away some valuable information about photography and booze that may well prove invaluable. We've scheduled meetings with two photographers, and will probably go to a wine tasting this weekend. And I like to think that we reaffirmed that there are some things we don't want in a wedding.
Like the bizarre foundation garments meant to hide large bottoms or pad small ones.
Or fake tans.
Or 3-D wedding videos.
I could go on.
I realize that, no matter what we do, some things are constants. Pachelbel's Canon in D will be at our wedding in some shape or form, no matter how hard we may try to avoid it.
But that doesn't matter. Because there will be booze. I mean love. It's all around us. It's all you need.
~G2B
There was no way out.
There was no way out.
"Sweetie," My Betrothed said, shaking me, "get up! We've got to go to the bridal show today!"
"Oh!" I said, glad to wake up to her smiling face from the nightmare I had been having. On to the Bridal Expo!
Did I mention I don't like crowds? I think I did.
Let's back up a ways.
My Betrothed and I arrived from opposite ends of the state to attend the show I mentioned in last week's post. The first thing she did was open up the envelope that had our tickets in it. Along with the passes and various essential information were our name tags.
Hers:
And mine:
Ahem. "Guest." My Betrothed is the "Bride" but I'm just a "Guest." I see. Now, I understand, of course, that many brides choose to go to these things with their bridesmaids, mothers, friends, et cettra. But could there have been, perhaps, a box on the website that she could have checked to get a "Groom" nametag? No? Just asking.
We arrived at the convention center, and a slow steady trickle of people (admittedly, mostly women) were converging upon it. We walked in the front doors and were immediately met with a string quartet playing Pachelbel's Canon in D. There were big giveaways (with, of course, strings attached) in the lobby, but My Betrothed pulled me to the registration booth. We were given a big bag full of flyers and things. I pointed at my (still blank) "Guest" name-tag, and started to ask the person behind the desk about it. Without a word, she took the tag from me, and handed me this:
I was thrilled. I was ready. Into the fray!
The fray turned out to be rooms full of vendors, looking like some sort of Mirror, Mirror universe version of ComicCon. Except, of course, that in the Mirror, Mirror universe characters who were normally clean shaven wore goatees. In this universe, the thousands of unwashed, goatee'd geeks were replaced by beardless, mostly well groomed brides to be.
There were still lots of booths with expensive things that people want but don't need, and, oddly enough, some "booth-babes." I wouldn't have thought using frighteningly skinny women in bikinis would be an effective way to attract the attention of brides, but apparently the people at the sunless tanning booths seemed to disagree.
No, I did not snap a picture of that. My Betrothed was holding my hand and I was not about to start taking pictures of mostly naked women.
We stopped by several booths with photographers. Before the Expo we were pretty close to choosing one. Now we aren't. My Betrothed (who had attended this event with her sister the year before, for a wedding now nearing its first anniversary) bemoaned that there were not nearly as many caterers with food samples this year. We passed a booth advertising a string quartet (this one with a recording rather than live players). Oddly enough, this booth was also playing Canon in D. The crowd was beginning to get to me, when I saw a light at the end of the tunnel:
Booze. Yes, there were samples of booze. There were also open cash bars, but I didn't think that was a good idea. Not that having a full sized drink sounded bad, but buying one did not appeal to me. The picture above is of a kind of pre-mixed champagne cocktail. It was alcopop. It would have to do. Then we rounded the corner and found a booth for a local winery. Free tasting! Ka-ching!
Yes, there are vineyards in Arizona. Some of them are even decent. Get used to it! When California falls into the Pacific, the climate here will be even better, too.
We also saw some flower arrangers that caught our eyes. I understand flowers are important in this sort of thing. Oh, and we passed yet another booth playing Canon in D.
Towards the end, the crowds began getting to both of us. A few vendors who we had hoped to see were not there (if I had read the website more carefully, I would have known that). By the time we got to the end, where the Bridal Fashion Show was, the models were done walking the catwalk, and had decided that they were too sexy for their bouquets, which they threw everywhere. So we tried for the exit and it was closed.
There was no way out.
There was no way out.
We would have to turn around and battle our way through this:
We traveled upstream, like salmon going to spawn. Eventually we made it back to the entrance, which was the only sanctioned exit. We passed, again, the live string quartet at the doors. We stopped and listened. We asked them to play "All You Need is Love." (Love, Actually FTW!) As we turned to go, thoroughly enchanted, they began playing Canon in D again.
Then we spent the day helping my Impending Sister in Law, and my Impending Brother in Law put together my Impending Nephew's Ikea furniture (he's due very soon. His name is the subject of some contention, though. "Brady Zac" is not his official name. Sadly, Joaquin isn't either. This feud is mostly between people who aren't the parents.) If there's one thing Ikea knows, it's how to make baby furniture in a way that really hurts to put together. Ow.
Afterward, on our drive home, My Betrothed turned to me and spoke. She had been battered by a morning of over-stimulation and an afternoon of hand-numbing hex-wrench twisting.
"I'm glad we went to the Bridal Show," she said.
"Me, too," I agreed.
"Can you put that part in the blog?"
"Sure."
And unlike the exchange and dream sequence that opened this post, that last conversation actually happened. And we both actually meant it. In the end, after all the over-exposure to the Wedding Industrial Complex, and all the rest, we took away some valuable information about photography and booze that may well prove invaluable. We've scheduled meetings with two photographers, and will probably go to a wine tasting this weekend. And I like to think that we reaffirmed that there are some things we don't want in a wedding.
Like the bizarre foundation garments meant to hide large bottoms or pad small ones.
Or fake tans.
Or 3-D wedding videos.
I could go on.
I realize that, no matter what we do, some things are constants. Pachelbel's Canon in D will be at our wedding in some shape or form, no matter how hard we may try to avoid it.
But that doesn't matter. Because there will be booze. I mean love. It's all around us. It's all you need.
~G2B
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Various and Sundry
Over to the right, I believe, you will now begin to see some Google Ads. This is because My Betrothed and I have thought it over, talked it over, and decided that selling out to the man just a teensy little bit couldn't hurt, not just this once. I have some limited control over that ad space, so if you ever see something that offends you, or that you think would offend me, or My Betrothed, or something that is just plain offensive, give me a heads up. I'll see what I can do. For now, though, know that all the money (if any) earned from this sell-out will go to the wedding.
It's not the most creative way to supplement the bride and groom's budget. If creative payment is what you want, the couple at Wedding Cans may be what you're looking for. If you haven't seen the news coverage of this venture (my mother discovered this and forwarded it to me. Of course, my mother holds a black-belt in Google-fu, so watch out!) and are too lazy to click the link, here's the scoop: Pete and Andrea of Spokane, WA, are attempting to pay for their wedding by recycling 400,000 aluminum cans. Now that's something I can get behind. In fact, My Betrothed and I are contemplating blatantly ripping this idea off, but we're not sure cash for recycle programs in our state really make this feasible, and living (as we do) hundreds of miles apart, we don't really have the time to pick up cans collected by our friends, loved ones, and internet stalkers. We'll keep you posted.
On another tangent, I want to give a shout-out to our friend Wrayvin. Wrayvin is not only the most consistent commenter on Impending Groom, she also supplies us with helpful hints from time to time. Most recently, she posted this link to a blog about a couple in Austin who seem to have similar tastes to our own. Thanks for the tips, Wrayvin!
I shall end this rather aimless and wandering (but Resolution fulfilling!) post with a teaser of next week's installment: My Betrothed has bought us tickets to the Arizona Bridal Show. Fear for me!
~G2B
It's not the most creative way to supplement the bride and groom's budget. If creative payment is what you want, the couple at Wedding Cans may be what you're looking for. If you haven't seen the news coverage of this venture (my mother discovered this and forwarded it to me. Of course, my mother holds a black-belt in Google-fu, so watch out!) and are too lazy to click the link, here's the scoop: Pete and Andrea of Spokane, WA, are attempting to pay for their wedding by recycling 400,000 aluminum cans. Now that's something I can get behind. In fact, My Betrothed and I are contemplating blatantly ripping this idea off, but we're not sure cash for recycle programs in our state really make this feasible, and living (as we do) hundreds of miles apart, we don't really have the time to pick up cans collected by our friends, loved ones, and internet stalkers. We'll keep you posted.
On another tangent, I want to give a shout-out to our friend Wrayvin. Wrayvin is not only the most consistent commenter on Impending Groom, she also supplies us with helpful hints from time to time. Most recently, she posted this link to a blog about a couple in Austin who seem to have similar tastes to our own. Thanks for the tips, Wrayvin!
I shall end this rather aimless and wandering (but Resolution fulfilling!) post with a teaser of next week's installment: My Betrothed has bought us tickets to the Arizona Bridal Show. Fear for me!
~G2B
Friday, January 1, 2010
Welcome 2010 (and I'm back... again)
Happy 2010, everyone.
One of my first resolutions for the new year is to post at least weekly on this blog. The nice thing about that is that I'll be able to look back a year from today and see how I did. The problem with it is I'll be able to look back a year from today and see how I did. Bet you saw that coming.
The holidays have been good to us, if a bit hectic. My first real date with My Betrothed occurred the day before Thanksgiving, 2008, so holidays have continued to be a big deal with us. There's nothing like jumping head-first into a family's November/December traditions to get the pulse of what they're all about. Big shout out to my future Mother and Sisters in Law, for always making me feel at home at theirs. So, that will be my excuse for not posting more often at the end of last year. But that's so 2009. The new Groom 2 Be is a posting machine. Already he's posted every single day of 2010.
So, a quick summary and update of our prenuptial adventures (I'll go into more detail on some of these in a future post):
My wedding related resolutions:
So, as we bid adieu to 2009, I can't help but think that if I got engaged last year, and I will get married next year, then the planning ahead of me for this year shall be truly epic, with all the wonder, terror, and excitement that the word "epic" implies.
~G2B
One of my first resolutions for the new year is to post at least weekly on this blog. The nice thing about that is that I'll be able to look back a year from today and see how I did. The problem with it is I'll be able to look back a year from today and see how I did. Bet you saw that coming.
The holidays have been good to us, if a bit hectic. My first real date with My Betrothed occurred the day before Thanksgiving, 2008, so holidays have continued to be a big deal with us. There's nothing like jumping head-first into a family's November/December traditions to get the pulse of what they're all about. Big shout out to my future Mother and Sisters in Law, for always making me feel at home at theirs. So, that will be my excuse for not posting more often at the end of last year. But that's so 2009. The new Groom 2 Be is a posting machine. Already he's posted every single day of 2010.
So, a quick summary and update of our prenuptial adventures (I'll go into more detail on some of these in a future post):
- The search for the perfect invitation continues apace (Now accepting suggestions for where to buy recycled card-stock);
- The hunt for bridesmaid dresses appears to be close to bearing fruit, though we'll see;
- The quest for a groomsman's gift (and indeed, a second groomsman) is almost ready to begin in earnest;
- The campaign for good reception music remains mostly successful, even as the new and bloody front of the ceremony music already appears set for a war of attrition;
- The mission to discover something that can actually be crossed off of the "to do" list is still listed as "unaccomplished." I don't think we've even checked off "finish making 'to do' list."
My wedding related resolutions:
- Post weekly to this blog;
- Save up my half of the wedding expenses;
- Get myself into "honeymoon shape."
So, as we bid adieu to 2009, I can't help but think that if I got engaged last year, and I will get married next year, then the planning ahead of me for this year shall be truly epic, with all the wonder, terror, and excitement that the word "epic" implies.
~G2B
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